Friendship and Discipleship for Men
A Safe Place
A friend came over last night to watch the Super Bowl with us. We had a good time and when he left he said- thanks for creating a safe place for me.
It made me realize that we are not safe in this world and don't always feel safe when telling the truth about ourselves or even just relaxing and being ourselves. The evil one is willing to go to great lengths to destroy us and just when we start to trust--he may come in for the kill. Sounds dramatic but betrayal is not funny and if we've grown up with it --it still haunts us.
I told a counselor one time that I didn't feel safe in my own house but did feel secure in my car- he said that is a common thing for him to hear and it is good to have someplace to feel safe.
So how do we create a safe place for ourselves and others? Proverbs 29:25 says, "The fear of man lays a snare, but whoever trusts in the Lord is safe."
First we have to trust in the Lord to take care of us and ultimately trust in him is everything. I have to work at not fearing man. It's not easy, but I'm doing better thru telling my story and not being rejected. Once we realize that the Lord is looking out for us-- he wants the best for us and would never harm us-- we can move out to others. I have lunch with a friend once a week. As we sit and talk we create a safe place thru trusting each other and caring for each others souls. This didn't come overnight but with prayer and time. The success of that friendship has strengthened me to reach out to others in the form of a samson group at our church. One thing that makes this group work is the commitment to "strictest confidence". Without that we can not feel safe to share our hearts with each other.
There is great freedom in telling the truth about ourselves.
As I trust the Lord with my life and my story, I realize that he is in control of everything. Each part of my story has him in it, even if I couldn't always see him. He redeems even the darkest parts for his glory. I see him working in my life and enlarging my safe place to include more brothers, all the time. Safety is necessary for us to open up our lives and for getting things into the light of the Lord's healing touch. Gods great love for us, is our healing, and in his loving arms is our safest place.
Comment
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Comment by Hank Austin on February 12, 2010 at 3:39am - Simply...Wow!!! Thanks for sharing.
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Comment by Raleigh on February 8, 2010 at 6:22pm -
What a timely message, Rich!
At our church study group my wife and I brought up the concept of safe places after hearing several people suggest that they did not feel safe sharing in our church. A few of the leaders had a hard time grasping the concept and one even seemed to bristle at the suggestion, asking "How can it ever be safe when we are all human?" It became obvious that they really don't get it and the group really isn't safe. The interesting thing is that several people hung around after class and we got to talking about how we can create this in our area... shared Nate's book with a couple brothers and we may have the makings of a Samson group here soon! An answer to our prayers!
My wife and I then decided to visit a later service at another area church we had visited a time or two before. We went early to join a prayer group and were thrilled to hear the leaders praying that the church would be a safe place for hurting people to heal. The love and authenticity that flowed throughout that group as we worshiped together has us feeling that we may have found a new church home regardless of denominational differences. Finding a safe place is so important. I pray that as we draw closer to our Father in healing, each of us can be used to create safe places for authentic sharing and healing in our communities. That's what's so beautiful about Samson fellowship.
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Comment by Donny on February 8, 2010 at 5:34pm -
Thanks for sharing Brother Rich. The fear of rejection can sometimes be overwhelming, especially where other men are concerned. God will continue to heal and will finish the work He started in us.
Donny
resources
* Samson Society Charter
* Suggested Meeting Format
* Revised Meeting Format
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NATE'S STORY
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PLAN YOUR OWN RETREAT
SAMSON BELOW DECKS
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